Tuesday, December 04, 2007


This will be the last short post in a long while, I promise :D .

So I was talking to my mate Kyle today. Back in high school he had a rather nasty reputation as a playboy slash bad/inattentive student, as well as a bit of the more naughty kids in class (he just didn't like listening to the lectures and amused himself with childish pranks). We didn't go to the same high school; he studied under the Jesuits, and although he wasn't the most religious person out there, Kyle still had the fear of God instilled in him. He was the type of person who would suddenly grow tense whenever the topic of Hell or death would be brought up, though he did not like to admit it. Anyway, Kyle came down with a very bad case of the flu last week. It was one of the worst illnesses he had ever gotten, which caused him to miss five school days.

In an effort to alleviate his fears, he contacted a Jesuit priest to give him anointing of the sick. Unfortunately, he was one of those students who preferred cutting classes and causing trouble more than listening and taking down notes, a fact which this Jesuit priest (who came from a socialite family) apparently never forgot. At his house, he surprised the priest by suddenly asking for the last rites (he apparently tricked the Jesuit, proferring another reason for his visit). Then the surprise came.

The Jesuit, clearly annoyed, suddenly blurted out, 'Tangina mo naman pala, eh', which in English is loosely translated as 'Your b*tch of a mother'. Said Jesuit relayed this without batting an eyelash, in crisp and accented Tagalog. Not knowing what to do, Kyle just laughed, and rather loudly at that, which the Jesuit clearly enjoyed. After giving him last rites, the Jesuit departed, but not without giving my friend a solid smack on the back first.

Ah, Jesuits. Sometimes I don't know if I should still be shocked by their antics. And worse, I don't know whether to laugh or cry at the incident.


Andrew said...

LOL... by the way, I heard about the curfew in Manila last week on the news at it was breaking...

How's everything? I sent u an email about it.

Archistrategos said...

Haha, I must confess I'm not a very 'religious' person when it comes to checking emails! LOL. Well the curfew only lasted one night, thank God. Sometimes I think the government needs to enforce the law just a wee bit harder-- that was a perfect example of military adventurism as well as just p*ss-poor politics... I'm still reeling from the fact that the perpetrator was an elected Senator!

Sadly, the bishop of my own diocese was part of that near-rebellion. It makes me weep for our clergy here-- it's bad enough as it stands, but the way our shepherds are acting could only make it worse.

Rita said...

Your story reminds me of "The Enduring Chill" by Flannery O'Connor.

A young man without much religious conviction is enchanted by a Jesuit he met in intellectual circles in a big city. When the young man returns to hicksville where he grew up, he becomes very ill (through his own stupidity) and decides to make his peace with God. He asks for a Jesuit to be summoned to his death bed, but instead of the urbane, sophisticated, intellectual he was expecting; the coarsest, roughest, crudest Irish Jesuit turns up.....it's worth a read for its black humour alone but suffice to say the Holy Spirit does win the day, even if not in the way the young man was intending.

Archistrategos said...

There's also that story about a supposed encounter between Sir Anthony Hopkins and a Jesuit. The story goes that the actor asked the Jesuit abut the shortest, most effective prayer he knew. The Jesuit replied: 'F--k it, it's in God's hands'.

Thanks for that story, Rita, I will now have to borrow that book! :)